Psychological Assessment and Evaluation
Personal and Confidential
Therapy notes from the personal files of Philip Rorshack, PhD

CLIENT
Bernie, The Forest Ranger Intern

PRECIPITATING EVENT THAT LED THE CLIENT INTO THERAPY
Bernie is stressed about the town dance he is attending tonight. On one hand, he is in love with Susan, the other forest ranger intern. She only has eyes for Ranger Bob. On the other hand, he feels great anxiety at the presence of Bob.

CHILDHOOD CONTEXT
Bernie's parents were extremely overindulging. The saw him as God's gift to the world, and he gladly internalized their view. Because of his parents indulging, Bernie never had to take responsibility. The message he consistently received during his childhood is that "he is special. Others are not."

CURRENT SITUATION
Bernie believes that others are here to serve him. This presents him with a difficult problem, because Ranger Bob is not only his boss, but Ranger Bob is very good at his job… let's face it, Bob is a legend. This sets up a immediate inferiority complex for Bernie. He is hostile toward everyone, especially Ranger Bob. Further, he is in competition with Ranger Bob for the affections of Susan.

ASSESSMENT
Bernie exhibits narcissistic personality disorder. He will continue to have personal and job stress until he comes to grips with his exploitive personality.

RECOMMENDATION
Intensive therapy to bring his fragile self-concept into line with reality.

OTHER NOTES
He plans on getting extremely drunk at the town dance tonight. No doubt this is a defense mechanism for his inferiority complex in the presence of Ranger Bob.

The little jerk ate two of my potted plants.

Psychological Assessment and Evaluation
Personal and Confidential
Therapy notes from the personal files of Philip Rorshack, PhD

CLIENT
Philip Scrotack, President and CEO of Scrotack Industries

PRECIPITATING EVENT THAT LED THE CLIENT INTO THERAPY
Philip Scrotack was deeply embarrassed by an incident at the town dance last night. Apparently, he had a small fight with Ranger Bob, and ended up crashing over a table and landing in the potato chip bowl. Mr. Scrotack is having a hard time coping with that public embarrassment.

He wanted me to say something to make his shame disappear. Upon realizing that I could not do this, he stood up and walked out.

CHILDHOOD CONTEXT
His family situation was a hostile one. His parents were socially hostile, and made him the object of their hostility. They were not only hostile around him, they were hostile to him. He has never developed an ability to trust others.

Apparently, when he was about ten years old, he tried to develop a relationship with a forest ranger. Little Scrotack watched this forest ranger from afar, and believed that the ranger might be someone who would befriend him. For weeks little Scrotack watched him, hoping that they could become friends. Little Scrotack dreamed of being together with this important forest ranger, and the ranger teaching him all there was to know about nature. When Scrotack found a really cool small octopus, he ran to show the ranger. The ranger told him to "go away," and "get out of here, kid, ya bother me." Those words still caused pain on the adult face of Scrotack.

Since that day, he has pursued a path of environmental destruction rather than preservation. He'll think nothing about slashing hundreds of acres of virgin forest to put up a nuclear power plant. He apparently hates all rangers and all that they stand for.

Scrotack is the worst enemy the environment ever had. He's no friend of Ranger Bob, either.

CURRENT SITUATION
Mr. Scrotack is fearless, antagonistic, malevolent, and domineering. He shows no emotion, except anger (He and my wife, Beulah, would get along well).

ASSESSMENT
Mr. Scrotack shows the unmistakable sign of anti-social personality disorder. He could kill me where I sit and have no remorse.

RECOMMENDATION
I recommend immediate hospitalization in a facility that is specific to antisocials. I suggested that to him, but he called me several names that usually refer to bodily functions.

OTHER NOTES
Mr. Scrotack is "going hunting" tonight. He talks about hunting a mosquito, but I can't help wondering if he's going to be hunting Ranger Bob as well.

Psychological Assessment and Evaluation
Personal and Confidential
Therapy notes from the personal files of Philip Rorshack, PhD

CLIENT
Susan, The Forest Ranger Intern

PRECIPITATING EVENT THAT LED THE CLIENT INTO THERAPY
Susan was arrested and hospitalized after threatening a federal forest ranger and several others with a gun. I was called by the hospital staff to give a psychological evaluation to determine whether she would be a danger to herself or others.

When I first saw her, she seemed normal and well-adjusted. However, as my questioning probed deeper, she became agitated and hostile. Her hostilities seem to revolve around an unrequited love from Ranger Bob. She exhibits extreme hostility for a woman named Anne MacDonald, who apparently is in an intimate relationship with Ranger Bob.

CHILDHOOD CONTEXT
According to the stories given by Susan, her parents exhibited a typical erratic pattern. They moved from expressions of love and then expressions of hostility. It was impossible for Susan to predict the pattern—she never knew if they were going to be loving or hostile. With no contextual evidence or identifiable patterns, Susan learned to imitate the erratic behavior. Consequently, Susan has had difficulty knowing what's appropriate, and is frequently unable to predict the consequences of her behavior.

CURRENT SITUATION
After she was knocked unconscious in a fight with Anne MacDonald, she was taken to the Hollywood Avenue Institution for the Criminally Insane. She still exhibits a profound "crush" on Ranger Bob, even to the point of fetishing some articles of his clothing. She is prone to erratic mood swings, from crying to hostility. She is currently under restraint in the psych ward at Hollywood Avenue, and has been prescribed Mellaril at 100 mg a day for her aggression and emotional instability.

ASSESSMENT
Susan exhibits clear Borderline Personality Disorder with Histrionic Features. Instability of self-image, and affective instability with mood shifts are seen. She has over-idealized her relationship with Ranger Bob, and displays anger and temper tantrums toward Anne MacDonald.

RECOMMENDATION
Recommend continued hospitalization and medication. I believe she would be a danger to herself and others.

OTHER NOTES
After I had spent some time with her, her hostilities toward me faded. She grew to trust me, I think. In fact, we seemed to develop a warm and gentle relationship. Amusingly, she even asked if she could take my picture. I found her beauty and her innocence strangely alluring…

Psychological Assessment and Evaluation
Personal and Confidential
Therapy notes from the personal files of Philip Rorshack, PhD

CLIENT
Mayor Perry Butts

PRECIPITATING EVENT THAT LED THE CLIENT INTO THERAPY
Mayor Butts is apparently pregnant. He believes that the "mother" is a giant carnivorous mosquito. This realization has created, quite understandably, a great deal of anxiety in Mayor Butts.

He is also grieving over his only friend, Philip Scrotack, who was attacked and eaten by the giant mosquito.

CHILDHOOD CONTEXT
Parental over-protection seems to be a predisposing factor for Mayor Butts. When he was a child, his mother and father did everything for him. He recalls that his color-blind mother dressed him until he was 26 years old. He was permitted to do nothing himself, his parents believing that he was too stupid to do it himself. During adolescence, his physical unattractiveness and his lack of skills at sports repeatedly created environments of separation and anxiety. This reinforced his lack of personality.

CURRENT SITUATION
Mayor Butts is in shock over the pregnancy and the loss of his friend. He does not seem to blame Ranger Bob for his predicament, even though it was Ranger Bob who had the final fight with Scrotack that left him vulnerable to the mosquito.

ASSESSMENT
Mayor Butts is incompetent, helpless, socially and sexually inept, and extremely naive and gullible. He exhibits a continuous internalization of others with the hope of getting them to like him. Consequently, by injecting himself into others, he becomes dependent on them. He seems content to lose his own autonomy if it will create a bond with someone else.

In other words, when the Good Lord handed out personalities, Mayor Butts was asking someone what he should do.

The loss of his friend, Philip Scrotack—who treated him like dung, by the way—is indicative of Mayor Butts approach to life. Now that he no longer has Scrotack, he does not know who he is.

However, I believe that he will love his yet-unborn child and show it the love that he never believed he had.

RECOMMENDATION
Mayor Butts needs long-term intensive therapy. I'd recommend three sessions a week, over the course of then next decade. But not with me, because he pisses me off.

Psychological Assessment and Evaluation
Personal and Confidential
Therapy notes from the personal files of Philip Rorshack, PhD

CLIENT
Anne MacDonald

PRECIPITATING EVENT THAT LED THE CLIENT INTO THERAPY
Anne has identified some areas of her life that she wants to explore. Apparently, the stressful experience of being kidnapped by a giant mosquito and the new relationship with Ranger Bob has raised some issues for her. Anxieties will always surface during stressful experiences, and to her credit, she has recognized them and wants to deal with those anxieties.

CHILDHOOD CONTEXT
She grew up on a ranch in Wyoming, from upper-middle class parents. She started her career as a swimsuit model at 18, with photo galleries in a variety of high-profile magazines.

Her first boyfriend was a cowboy, a hired hand on the ranch. He mistreated her before she dumped him.

When she was 20 years old, she and a number of other models were doing an exotic photo shoot on the Amazon River in South America. A swarm of Amazon Pack Mosquitoes descended on them, creating chaos among the crew. A couple of the models were carried away to the hive. Several hundred mosquitoes attacked Anne's right leg, and despite her best efforts to brush them away, they continued to gouge and suck. With only a few seconds before she lost her leg, she dunked her leg into the Amazon River, and the piranhas ate the mosquitoes off her leg. Unfortunately, the resulting scars cut short her modeling career.

She went into entomology, with a fascination for mosquitoes but also a healthy respect for them. She completed her PhD dissertation on the aggressive new breeds of mosquitoes. The Brazilian Tiger mosquito, with it's rapid ability to mutate, was a species that was of particular interest for her.

CURRENT SITUATION
She continues to cope with the horror of the bug death and the issues surrounding the mosquito. She is also developing a deep relationship with Ranger Bob. This may prove to be a conflicted relationship, as Bob (also a patient of mine) recoils from the controlling, smothering experiences, where as Anne may seek those experiences out.

ASSESSMENT
Anne is confident and independent, assertive and guarded in her self-disclosure. She may have some mild sadistic tendencies, but only among willing partners. Her reoccurring fantasy is to dress up like a cowgirl and mistreat her partner. No doubt she is reliving her early boyfriend experience.

RECOMMENDATION
Anne should be aware of her hidden dominatrix tendencies. Further therapy may be able to draw that out.

OTHER NOTES
Mental note: don't ask her to dress up as a cowgirl for me.

Psychological Assessment and Evaluation
Personal and Confidential
Therapy notes from the personal files of Philip Rorshack, PhD

CLIENT
Ranger Bob Trooper, United States Forest Service

PRECIPITATING EVENT THAT LED THE CLIENT INTO THERAPY
Bob is nervous about his new relationship with Anne MacDonald (another one of my clients). While he is truly in love with her, he has a certain uneasiness about her. Confidentiality ethics prohibited me from telling him about her reoccurring fantasy of riding him like a pony in her cowgirl outfit (the lucky bastard).

CHILDHOOD CONTEXT
One of Bob's defining moments was the horror of the bulldozer accident when he was eight years old. A series of bulldozers were clearing land for a new business office development near his home. He watched in horror as the bulldozers leveled the field that he used to play in. As he watched, he realized that the bulldozers were headed for a nest of newborn bunnies. He raced toward them, to save them, but was plowed under by the bulldozer. Only his nose remained sticking up out of the dirt. He spent a day there, unable to move. Finally, a small herd of bunnies dug him out—Bob said they dug until their little paws were bloody. Since then, he has not only been claustrophobic, but he also has had a certain relationship with animals. It is a well known maxim in town that "When Ranger Bob talks, the animals listen."

CURRENT SITUATION
Bob seems to have an intense reaction to any kind of smothering experience. He blows up poachers who smother the environment. He scolds his interns when they smother rare flowers. He feels smothered in small places. And perhaps, he senses Anne's mild dominatrix tendencies—an example of emotional smothering.

The focal point of Bob's anxieties seem to be the smothering.

ASSESSMENT
Bob's claustrophobia displaces the anxiety of being smothered. While he seems to have the claustrophobia under control (thanks to the wise counsel of Old Doc Fodder), he may continue to have manifestations of his smothering phobia.

RECOMMENDATION
Bob could continue in therapy on a bi-weekly basis to help him come to grips with his smothering fears. He should approach the smothering influences, rather than avoid them.

OTHER NOTES
I was in awe in the presence of Bob. His steely, rugged nature; his passion for the environment; his well-known martial arts prowess. My client was Ranger Bob, the legend.

I took off my shoes in his presence, for I stood on holy ground.